One of the most damaging things parents can bring into the lives of their children, and vice versa, is the negative past.  What we tend to do as humans is dwell on something that has taken place in our past – presumably something very negative – and live with it, bringing it into our present, destroying the most powerful moment we have.  It is really important to remember that our most powerful moment, ever, is our present.  Right now we have the ability to accomplish basically whatever we want.  This is true at all times, 24/7.  So why would we want to waste our most creative moment with our destructive past?  But this is the way the human ego works.

In family law, we see this all the time.  Untold family situations where a spouse cannot get over the fact that they were hurt by the other spouse in the past.  They bring these feelings of hurt or rage or resentment into the present, and expect their attorney to make everything okay, while they carry on this very negative energy.  When solving problems from the past, it is so important to bring a better, stronger, more positive and loving energy into the solution than what was put into the problem in the first place.  We don’t make bad situations out of really positive, loving energies.  It’s impossible.

The same with kids.  If your mother or father wronged you in the past, you cannot dwell on that pain in the present, because to do so is to color everything we do now with the pain from the past.  It is the same with the future.  We have no control over our future, except for the energies we put out there into the universe at this time.  So don’t color your present with the stress, fear, or anxiety of some unknown future event.  You don’t want to pain our most powerful moments with these negative energies.  All we have is right now.  And if we recognize this, and live in our presence, and we put love and joy into everything we do, the outcome will always be positive.

So if you’ve been pained by a love one, let it be.  Accept it and surrender to the past, and make the present a very healing moment, by not adding to the negative energies that can cloud our futures.  Take the time to communicate, from the heart, not the egoic mind, which is the best way to solve any solution.  When we communicate this from the heart, the human ego has nothing negative to feed off of, and the communication, and eventual solution to any problem, is fed with nothing but the fabric of love, respect, and compassion from which we were created.